本文轉貼自PTT
台灣最大的本土社群網站
分享這篇文章到Facebook、Google+或噗浪！


 作者  PegasusSeiya (天馬座星矢)                              看板  Gossiping 
 標題  Re: [問卦] 有沒有古代馬英九劉禪的八卦?                                 
 時間  Tue Sep  4 11:54:55 2012                                               
───────────────────────────────────────

※ 引述《zoddohappy (zoddohappy)》之銘言：
: 劉禪 樂不思蜀
: 螞蝗以後有可能樂不思台嗎??
: 劉禪還有個諸葛亮
: 我們的螞蝗呢??  誰是他的諸葛亮呢?
: 愛說白賊的   陳水中   還是....?
: 不過螞蝗的學歷真的蠻不錯的
: 拿國民黨給的中山獎學金到哈佛當職業學生
: 回來教書兩年 還不是法律主要課目 就可以獲得律師執照
: 一路平步青雲
: 劉禪跟螞蝗的共通點就是靠爸一族
: 還有都是中國統一的重大推手
: 現在 薪資退步 物價飛漲 國防空虛 政治貪腐 經濟蕭條 奇怪耶你
: 究竟
: 螞蝗會有什麼歷史定位呢??
: 我覺得是跟劉禪很像啦
: 說真的 我們真的需要一個諸葛亮!

                劉禪                            阿九

老爸            白手起家拼到皇帝                乾女兒而亡

學經歷          太子教育                        哈佛
                第一份工作就是皇帝              甲等特考,無牌律師

兒時經歷        虎豹騎-血戰長訽坡               愛在哈佛-苦吞紅燒肉

領土            漢中-四川-雲南                  台北-台中-高雄
                鬼島N倍大                       遊戲裡沒地圖

首都            川府成都                        號稱天龍國的TPE

副手            諸葛亮                          白賊

國防            姜維,魏延,王平,陳到,李嚴        陳照敏
                蜀連者                          高滑住

邊防            漢中魏延王平                    金防部義務役
                永安陳到李嚴羅憲                馬防部義務役

軍隊組成        川軍,荊州軍,無當飛軍            中華民國國軍義務役

不安屬地        南蠻孟獲                        台南仁醫

內政重臣        諸葛亮                          流照玄
                蔣琬                            白賊
                費禕                            615
                董允                            014

外交            對等外交-孫吳                   跪求舔合-米國老爸,阿共

外交方式        時而開戰時而求和                黑人前做扶地挺身+送錢

骨氣            諸葛,姜維前後抗敵               直接外送台勞

人事關係處理    親自指派任官                    黨政第一
                蜀內不同派系互相制衡            其他弄黑

黨國老臣關係    稱諸葛為相父                    戰哥楚魚金平心結
                敬重趙雲(升任大官)              有的有官做,但關係微妙又緊張
                重用張翼廖化                    有的踢一邊無視
                期間無叛變記錄                  搞到同邊的跳出來變敵人

決策能力        不一定會聽諸葛亮                只有依法行政
                常有自己的想法和做法            有想法沒有做法
                但又不失尊重                    國小作文式喊話讓人無言

忍耐力          可能是承受最大壓力              四年不開冷氣,二十年不換被
                三國在位最久皇帝                寄信給姐姐抱怨

人民            面對強大外敵                    外送當台勞
                卻能安定耕作居住                房子買不起
                                                薪資還倒退14年

老婆            星彩                            克莉斯丁.周

武器            細劍                            泳褲

--
※ 發信站: 批踢踢實業坊(ptt.cc)
◆ From: 17.92.138.108
→ stan1231:老婆錯了  是愛新覺羅˙ＯＯ                             09/04 11:55
→ tisen:XD                                                        09/04 11:56
→ jorden:愛人是小刀吧                                             09/04 11:56
推 ChinHuiTsao:劉禪才是人生勝利組                                  09/04 11:56
推 flux:下場　　亡國　　　　　　　　　　　　　　＿＿               09/04 11:56
推 fireda:其實有叛變紀錄 孟獲是叛變起事 不是外來敵人               09/04 11:57
推 no5566:副手  諸葛亮  vs  白賊     怎嚜差一大截                  09/04 11:57
推 hsunting2000:劉禪算很厲害的了 可以撐那麼久                      09/04 11:58
推 tokyoboy:裝備還有慢跑鞋                                         09/04 11:58
→ fireda:諸葛亮比較像是行政院長 皇帝沒有副手吧                    09/04 11:58
→ kyle824:幹嘛汙辱我的偶像                                  劉禪  09/04 11:58
→ fireda:要也是像陳燵                                             09/04 11:58
推 amadis01:副手樂勝 起碼會處理內政...                             09/04 11:59
推 sgorangeroad:            細劍                 泳褲              09/04 11:59
→ JEFF0602:其實劉禪好像有點被三國演義醜化了，實際上他前半段人生   09/04 11:59
推 ID556:不知道為何，看到劉禪的武器是細見就笑了XD                  09/04 12:00
推 sk050607:原po有玩三國無雙6  XD                                  09/04 12:01
推 Epimenides:克莉斯丁.周 是三小                                   09/04 12:01
推 asjlk:馬英丸真的是史上最爛的領導者......                        09/04 12:03
推 revive25:馬說他不開冷氣 那總統府的冷氣是沒開嗎 還是手下開得     09/04 12:03
→ fategg:上面沒有他的指紋就不算開阿                               09/04 12:03
推 hsiyafel:+9細劍?                                                09/04 12:03
推 beergap:請問要加入網路黨工要去哪報名?  時薪?                    09/04 12:04
推 Oracle5566:他不用自己的手開冷氣阿 都是手下開 都是they they      09/04 12:04
推 bbxu:有笑有推                                                   09/04 12:04
→ fireda:而且劉禪的能力都個位數 http://i.imgur.com/ajx1C.jpg

      09/04 12:05
推 dummydoll:阿斗狂勝                                              09/04 12:05
推 sk050607:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hZ9IN-szKWo
             09/04 12:05
→ belmontc:劉禪在諸葛亮死後還讓蜀國撐很久,別真當他是廢物 至於馬?  09/04 12:06
推 swanmin5566:XDDDD                                               09/04 12:07
→ analysis0813:不要侮辱劉禪                                       09/04 12:07
推 chicgo:阿斗阿斗我們愛你                                         09/04 12:07
推 uless:只有倒退14年嗎?昨天新聞好像報倒退17年了耶 你太低估阿九啦  09/04 12:08
→ stan1231:後世會以馬囧來暗指 此人是極為昏庸之人                  09/04 12:09
→ uless:阿斗魅力還有52  阿九的民調不知道有沒有5成2勒              09/04 12:10
推 ssssk:增加一項宦官佞臣  黃皓           族繁不及備載             09/04 12:11
推 rei410553:阿斗猛的哩                                            09/04 12:11
推 looks143895:馬娘 魅力 應該贏過阿斗數倍                          09/04 12:11
推 weltschmerz:三國志系列裡的阿斗評價那麼低喔= =                   09/04 12:12
推 no5566:劉禪魅力還有52  阿九的民調不知道有沒有5成2勒     18%?    09/04 12:14
推 bobju:諸葛亮也沒用啊~ 終其一生仍無法做到外來政權本土化.         09/04 12:15
推 tep1214:不管你信不信 反正我信了                                 09/04 12:16
推 hcyalex:光榮的國志系列都是三國演義的故事 跟正史三國志脫節很大   09/04 12:18
推 YU0158:阿九十年前魅力也有52 不然師奶殺手怎麼來的                09/04 12:18
推 ba5566:XD                                                       09/04 12:18
推 twlight:劉禪樂勝啊~~                                            09/04 12:18
推 knml:XX比雞腿,馬英九能力連阿斗的1/100都不到                     09/04 12:19
推 countrysong:劉禪樂勝                                            09/04 12:19
推 clintvivA:阿斗打趴阿狗啦                                        09/04 12:19
推 tombknight:台肯                                                 09/04 12:20
推 njiok:下場 被斬首後鞭屍                                         09/04 12:20
噓 appl:難怪689都跑去假裝609  因為選了一個比阿斗還無能的人太丟臉?  09/04 12:21
推 clbb:XD                                                         09/04 12:22
推 ax227762:決策能力太中肯了XD                                     09/04 12:23
推 wj790418:有笑有推                                               09/04 12:24
推 Mood310400:不能把佞臣寫出來啊 這樣幅度會加長10倍而且左邊是空的  09/04 12:24
推 weismiley:推                                                    09/04 12:25
推 ilanese:有笑有推~~                                              09/04 12:28
推 newglory:我開始相信你了!!                                       09/04 12:29
推 Zeroyeu:少說了武器:十六字箴言~                                  09/04 12:31
推 tokyoto:副手的強項不同 諸葛亮是智99 白賊是噓99(此噓為說謊之意)  09/04 12:31
推 HIRUMA:請不要再覽趴比雞腿了！  阿斗超強的好嗎？                 09/04 12:33
推 OrzJ:看到不安屬地笑了                                           09/04 12:33
推 strike519:梗好好笑                                              09/04 12:34
推 JellyLee:你贏了                                                 09/04 12:34
推 FRX:XDDDD                                                       09/04 12:35
推 asuran:XD                                                       09/04 12:39
推 ewq127:哈~都義務役真靠                                          09/04 12:39
推 DALUGI:怎麼沒有金小刀? 小刀形式上沒官位 但有實質影響力啊~~~~    09/04 12:40
推 wowo72517:阿斗很聰明的呢,你對他有所誤會~                        09/04 12:40
推 sanhowu:推                                                      09/04 12:41
推 heteropod:台南仁醫也太好笑了                                    09/04 12:42
推 looks143895:兒時記憶  XD                                        09/04 12:45
推 jukada:劉禪竟然樂勝？！                                         09/04 12:46
推 mexxxxem:有研究過！！                                           09/04 12:47
推 shyachi:這篇盡然沒有戰神阿扁登場                                09/04 12:47
推 ssdog:馬跟劉禪比 懶叫比雞腿                                     09/04 12:50
推 maichugi:挑個小毛病費"禕"......                                 09/04 12:50
推 carlos5978:愛在哈佛 苦吞紅燒肉 XD                               09/04 12:51
推 u1988926:XD                                                     09/04 12:53
推 pptsodog:靠北XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD                                09/04 12:53
推 tigernaxo:的確是這樣 XDD                                        09/04 12:54
推 kshtainan:XDDDD                                                 09/04 12:57
推 alentek:不安屬地   XDDDDDDDDDDDDD  要派兵平亂嗎?  主公          09/04 13:06
推 Maupassant:阿九至少有舌戰大決:十六字箴言~                       09/04 13:06
推 aduijjr:能比嗎?                                                 09/04 13:08
推 HuntBear:拿馬英九比劉禪 那是污辱劉禪吧                          09/04 13:10
推 kaku216:幹你把話說清楚做什麼XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD              09/04 13:12
推 b22222217200:泳褲是啥小XDDDDDDDDD                               09/04 13:12
推 sailor815:XDD                                                   09/04 13:13
推 BleuCiel69:XDDDDDDDDD                                           09/04 13:15
推 kennethlin:要還劉禪一個公道 阿斗新誕生                          09/04 13:17
推 coolptt:比劉禪廢                                                09/04 13:21
推 vivider:push                                                    09/04 13:23
推 rabbit80891:應該是 臭青母 叭 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!                   09/04 13:23
推 st880517:可以借轉Joke嗎XD??                                     09/04 13:25
→ PegasusSeiya:樓上, OK!                                          09/04 13:28
推 whitezealman:笑中帶淚  有笑有推                                 09/04 13:28
推 lucifa38:劉禪表示: 終於有人比我還要低能了 阿久:逆風高飛!!!!!    09/04 13:30
推 miel:阿斗得勝                                                   09/04 13:32
推 BB2003:這篇超好笑 XD                                            09/04 13:33
推 pegasusatlan:XDD                                                09/04 13:38
推 KingKingCold:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD         09/04 13:41
推 vespar:馬英九比劉禪還廢  唯一可以相提並論的就是晉惠帝           09/04 13:42
推 puagao:推~                                                      09/04 13:44
推 KingKingCold:這篇真的是比得好XDDDDDDDDD                         09/04 13:44
推 karting:忍耐力XDDD                                              09/04 13:45
推 KingKingCold:外交方式      黑人前做扶地挺身+送錢                09/04 13:50
→ KingKingCold:中肯XDDDDDDDDDDDD                                  09/04 13:50
推 iamwilliams:鳥芙丸                                              09/04 13:56
推 s0857168:能力值 統率1 武力15 智力0 政治75 魅力99                09/04 13:56
推 Jaicabai:XDDDDDDDDDDD 靠超好笑                                  09/04 13:57
→ Jaicabai:劉禪:哪個沒眼睛的敢說我比馬芙丸還廢 \ /                09/04 13:59
推 egbertwn:太有才了吧XDDDDDDDDDD                                  09/04 14:00
推 davidhill:XDDDDDD                                               09/04 14:01
推 qwilfish:XD                                                     09/04 14:03
推 tonys1126:哈哈哈哈哈哈哈中肯                                    09/04 14:08
推 lanhow:XD                                                       09/04 14:08
推 pianoandme:笑了                                                 09/04 14:10
→ KingKingCold:真的，劉禪在位的時候，蜀國政治平穩，文官認真，國   09/04 14:12
→ KingKingCold:庫充盈，兵糧充裕，光是政治能力，就比馬好上百倍     09/04 14:13
推 KingKingCold:劉禪在位，可以支持蜀國跟魏打這麼多年仗，國力根抵   09/04 14:15
→ KingKingCold:之豐厚，反觀馬英九，舉債創新高，股市救不了，整天   09/04 14:16
→ KingKingCold:只懂得跟別人簽經濟條約，捧著個談判機會當作救命仙   09/04 14:16
推 akirakid:克利斯汀•青才對吧                                     09/04 14:16
→ KingKingCold:丹，失業率貧富差距創新高，但國民年收入卻創新低     09/04 14:17
→ KingKingCold:油電雙漲，還拖自殺率一起漲，這廢物比劉禪廢太多了   09/04 14:17
→ zoea:光老婆是星彩就贏了                                         09/04 14:20
推 writer1116:劉禪大勝                                             09/04 14:21
推 windli:XDDDDDDDDD                                               09/04 14:22
推 donatello:怎麼沒有把技能樹列出來!! 馬英九的強項就是技能多~      09/04 14:24
推 gogoangelin:泳褲是哪招XDD                                       09/04 14:25
→ donatello:還有馬英九的無雙應該是握手吧 有化骨䏰掌的威力         09/04 14:25
推 lingahong:和馬央丸對比下來 劉禪根本是明君好嗎 不是同一個層次的  09/04 14:26
推 modjo:XDDDDDDDDD                                                09/04 14:29
推 irenehuang15:劉禪真衰小，跟這個露奶男比                         09/04 14:33
推 yayaorz:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDd                                  09/04 14:34
推 Noren:有沒有人願意幫劉禪平反一下?光在位最久就肯定是有才幹的     09/04 14:34
推 fardima:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD               09/04 14:41
推 deadboy:細劍 泳褲 XDDDDDDDDD                                    09/04 14:45
推 EX37:副手根本是痛電啊XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD            09/04 14:45
推 Kreen:靠北，這樣看劉禪根本狂電19∼                              09/04 14:49
推 Octopuster:突然覺得劉禪好強                                     09/04 14:53
推 capssan:為什麼要拿劉禪跟個女人比  要也是拿武則天來筆吧          09/04 14:56
推 Terrill:.....我是信了                                           09/04 15:00
推 cardemily:泳褲實在是太好笑了xDDDDDDD                            09/04 15:10
推 Benedixin:劉禪樂勝!                                             09/04 15:17
推 firecrest:有才!!!!!!!!!!!                                       09/04 15:26
推 jk10290118:原PO歷史系?                                          09/04 15:32
推 ashawn:寄信給姐姐抱怨... XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD  09/04 15:47
推 night0204:劉禪大勝!!!!!!!                                       09/04 15:48
※ NTUkerker:轉錄至某隱形看板                                      09/04 15:48
推 NTUkerker:XDDDD                                                 09/04 15:49
→ ba5566:       ============可以加一下 佞臣嗎???==========        09/04 15:52
推 lonelynight:也太有梗了你                                        09/04 15:53
推 Jason1122:不安屬地:台南仁醫 XDDDDDDDDDD                         09/04 15:53
※ 編輯: PegasusSeiya    來自: 17.92.138.108        (09/04 15:56)
推 tfoxboy:哈哈                                                    09/04 15:57
推 spongebob716:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD                              09/04 15:58
→ OOQ:佞臣:黃皓v.s小刀？                                          09/04 16:07
推 Asucks:劉禪的政治智慧根本是馬惠帝遠遠不及                       09/04 16:11
推 chivalry70:金靠北XD                                             09/04 16:11
推 apple1224:武器 泳褲XDDDDDDDDDDDD                                09/04 16:14
推 diggi:我相信了                                                  09/04 16:35
推 LPKing:這篇怎不m…超靠杯的啊!!!哈哈~~                           09/04 16:41
推 ian60702:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD  09/04 16:46
→ ian60702:四星彩XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD  09/04 16:46
推 RichardMa:有笑有推, 不推對不起國人.                             09/04 16:55
推 babaluu:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD                                     09/04 16:56
推 s8624032:馬狗連劉禪的大便都比不上!!                             09/04 16:58
推 iloverene:老婆: 愛新覺羅 小刀                                   09/04 17:02
推 yenchen1970:哈哈                                                09/04 17:28
→ otld:請不要侮辱劉禪                                             09/04 17:28
推 PPPGGG:好好笑XDDDDD                                             09/04 17:50
推 faxy:!!                                                         09/04 18:13
推 gamertwo:拿阿斗跟阿狗比! 這對阿斗是莫大汙辱阿!                  09/04 18:23
推 kudo0930:武器是泳褲XDDD                                         09/04 18:29
推 howshaw:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD                         09/04 18:36
推 Joypaste:不安屬地也太好笑了吧  好婊                             09/04 19:15
推 PanJason:真的好好笑XD                                           09/04 19:55
推 Simonfenix:三國演義後期根本是10倍速快轉 因為主角都歸天了        09/04 19:57
→ Simonfenix:剩下的也不知道怎麼寫                                 09/04 19:58
推 leocat:XDD                                                      09/04 20:16
推 siriusu:我愛阿斗耶 你幹嘛!!                                     09/04 20:32
推 Hyacinth0:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD 一定要推                           09/04 20:33
→ puszta:光老婆馬就被電爆                                         09/04 20:35
推 Bluebear:XDDDDDDDDDDDD                                          09/04 20:36
推 waeting:請不要汙入劉禪!!!找一個智商低於60的假哈佛來跟他比?      09/04 20:39
推 nba10346:朝聖推                                                 09/04 20:41
推 nckukath:不要污辱劉禪                                           09/04 20:49
推 PTTsir:好讚的比較                                               09/04 21:08
推 f11IJ:馬英九跟劉禪比起來根本是個智障..........................  09/04 21:16
推 terryporter:幹！我笑翻了                                        09/04 23:10
推 jimihsu:幹，好好笑                                              09/04 23:15
推 flyawaylife:看來用阿斗形容馬囧，是污辱了劉禪                    09/04 23:19
※ hatako:轉錄至某隱形看板                                         09/04 23:35
推 eslite12:                                                       09/04 23:51
※ eslite12:轉錄至某隱形看板                                       09/04 23:51
推 smallx3:乾女兒應該改成干干女ㄦ                                  09/04 23:56
推 hateA7V:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD                            09/05 00:09
推 EEQQ:武器我笑了                                                 09/05 00:21
推 r345r12:XDD                                                     09/05 00:22
噓 snowrain:喔                                                     09/05 01:22
推 flyinhigh:超中肯,小心收到小禮物~~~                              09/05 02:52
推 lunasi:別汙辱劉禪 !!!!                                          09/05 08:24
推 motorolla:跟英狗比簡直污辱了劉禪!!                              09/05 10:48
推 zoddohappy:阿斗真的樂勝!!!!                                     09/05 13:45
→ zoddohappy:簡直是雲泥之別                                       09/05 13:46
推 spiral1226:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDD                                      09/05 18:25
→ minbyminby:武器 泳褲wwww                                        09/05 19:06
→ minbyminby:阿斗白了                                             09/05 19:06
推 hsin888:阿斗根本樂勝右邊的智障!!                                09/06 02:00

----本文使用PCMAN+BBI轉貼----


※ 新版PCMAN開放測試中，新增功能：    



用PCMAN+BBI連回PTT原文